lost in the garden state (or, never take the new jersey turnpike for fear of going bankrupt)

i drove to see my brother and sister-in-law last week in virginia. the most direct route, albeit the most expensive due to excessive toll roads, is the i-95, aka "new jersey turnpike," straight through new jersey. so i weigh my options: $50 in tolls versus a longer yet more beautiful, peaceful and cheaper drive through pennsylvania... i'm a scrooge, pennsylvania wins. and i'm off down the road, feeling pretty smart in my dirty little bob the saab.

there's one little life lesson i seem to keep on learning over and over again, namely that when i try to avoid anything that thing usually is thrown straight into my path. this is also the reason why i am a terrible liar. and true to form, in trying to avoid new jersey, i somehow ended up lost in new jersey. have you ever been lost in new jersey? i keep asking people that to which most reply, "how do you get lost in new jersey? all it is is one big turnpike." one big expensive turnpike, that is. i sort of think this is how they fund the entire state's economy. so i then decide to try and get out of new jersey as soon as possible. and my next "shortcut" turns into another one of bethany's brainy schemes into confusion.

rainy, foggy, way too much traffic. i think the northeast hates me, or atleast is having fun testing my determination. probably both. my eight hour jaunt turned into a nine, ten, eleven, twelve-thousand year long excursion, through hill an dale, valley and forge. i think i saw the netherlands at one point.

i'm still not really sure where i was or how i got there, only that eventually some kind person in a toll booth told me how to get to virginia. that was after he told me he thought all people from pennsylvania were idiots. i asked him what he thought about people from tennessee. "are you from tennessee, sweetie?" "yes sir..." "i love people from tennessee!" i laughed and drove on.

just shy of lisa loeb, yet with an almost velvet undergroundish flair... mirah's sweepstake prize